Why Love Hurts

Why Love Hurts

People that fall in love hopes to fall in love with someone that will love them back and feel the same that they do. They want to have unconditional love and they want someone that will care for them and take care of them. They want to be with a partner that is willing to be committed to them and to see them as part of their future.

Someone that falls in love wants to have someone that will be their forever. There are many, many people that find this kind of love, finding the perfect person that will be with them for life and wherever life takes them.

What happens though when you love someone, and you meet a partner, but they end up not being the right partner for you? You might not be ready to allow someone to come into your life because of problems of past relationships or just the idea of having to give up your life for someone else. Maybe, you think that you will never meet the person that is perfect for you.

When you have someone that loves you back, finding love and being in love is easy. You will know if you want to be committed to this person and you will realize that you have met someone that has the same ideas and goals that you have and you will want to be in a long-term relationship with this person.

On the other hand, many people do not find this in a relationship, and they are with people that are not healthy for them and they become vulnerable and confused. Sometimes people get stuck in a pattern of dating behaviors where they always pick the same kind of toxic relationships and never seem to get to a place where they want to be in life.

What happens to you when you find yourself in a relationship where you love your partner, but you know in your heart that they do not love you the same? This can be a situation of a repetitive mistake that you make and even if you have a hard time recognizing the signs, you wonder why people cannot love you the way that you love them.

There are some things that you can look for in a relationship so that you do not keep making the same mistakes over and over again.

Love Versus Love

There is a different kind of love for different people. Some people are romantic and deeply in love, but their partner does not always treat them the same or care for them. Being with someone that you are in love with is a big deal and you hope that you will be the only person that they ever want and need but when your partner changes over time, they might not show love like you show to them.

If you are able to accept this kind of behavior, then that is up to you, but this is an unrealistic situation in any behavior and will result in you feeling upset, angry and hurt. This is something you need to pay attention from your first date and on.

Doing Things Without You

It is important for partners to have different plans here and there but if your partner does not share the same ideas or goals that you have then chances are the relationship will not work out for you. This can mean that your partner is not sharing your same dreams such as having children or where you want to live in the future. Make sure that you share the same goals for your future before you really let your heart go.


It is important that you feel that your partner is interested in every aspect of your life. They should want to know about you, and they should want to know things deeply about you. If you want to have a relationship that is solid, you should be discussing your life with your partner and you should know everything about them, and they should know everything about you.

You should know all of their annoying quirks and all of the ugly things about them, but they should equally want to know all these things about you. Your partner should work to find out what you are passionate about in life. If they are not caring to know you more, maybe it is time to end the relationship before you get hurt more.


The effort of being close to someone should not just be in your court. Your partner should care enough about you to actively engage in the relationship and they should want to build the relationship and see it develop. If you find that you are always the one that has to put in the effort and sacrifices in the relationship, then maybe you are giving too much for your partner.

Take time to sit back and reevaluate your relationship and see if you are doing what is best for both of you and just for them.


Being in a relationship means that you are going to spend time with your partner. This does not mean that you won’t each have your own friends and want friend time, but you should not have to be always competing with friends and family to have attention from your partner.

If you find that your partner is spending more time with other people and less intimate time with you, the relationship might not be as important to them as it is you. It is important that your partner spend a large amount of their life with you so that your relationship can grow and become stronger.


Do not ignore the red flags or what your gut is telling you in your relationship. Never ignore the feelings of loneliness or anger that you get and do not just try to force a relationship to work so that you can be in a relationship.

If you want to be with someone, find someone that will love you like you love them, someone that will want to spend time with you and someone that shares your hopes and dreams.

When you choose to be in a relationship that you always have to fight for or where you have to beg attention, you will find that you will end up disappointed in each and every way.

Learn to love yourself enough to be with someone that cares enough for you to give you what you need and then when you are giving your all to them, it can be an equal playing field. There is nothing wrong with falling in love but make sure that you are smart in your relationship and that you choose a relationship that you deserve and that works for you in every way.